There use to be a time when none of my girls would come to me with their problems. I was very self absorbed and I thought my problems were the only ones that existed. As I got older I got over myself and became a go to person. I appreciated the fact that my girls felt they could come to me and that they cared what I thought. More and more I realized that wasn't the case. A lot of times they just needed to vent or share their thoughts. They didn't care about the resolution I provided or what I thought was in their best interest.
I learned this the hard way. Of course most of the problems your girls come to you with are about the men in their lives. One week 4 of my girls came to me and I swear they all were dealing with some dumb shit. Things that if I was them I wouldn't tolerate but apparently that is the cancer zodiac sign in me that lowers my level of patience for bs. The situations ranged from "he hit me" to "why won't he take me back." To protect the innocent I am not going to put anyone on blast but really I was annoyed, frustrated and pissed all at the same time. All of my girls are smart and beautiful women who can have anyone they want. Instead they get stuck on one guy and don't know how to let go. Then they just spend so much time crying and trying to fix it. Clearly things are always easier to decipher when you are sitting on the sideline but if people are trying to open your eyes why are you so against it?
So if you don't want my opinion and you already have your mind set on what you are going to do DON'T ASK. Just say I need to vent and need someone to listen. I am a good listener and if thats all you want I got you. There is no reason for me to waste my breath. Trust me I could spend that energy talking about other things.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Why ask?
Posted by Monologues of a FASHiONiSTA at 11:42 PM
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1 comments:
Good topic of convo Trey Songs. Like you, I had to learn the hard way that folks dont always take the advice you give them. Regardless of how down and out someone sounds when they come at you with their problems, they are still a grown ass adult and they are going to make the choice to either take your advice or not. You can't take it personal if they don't take your advice because at the end of the day, they have to lay in the bed that they made. Just know that there is a chance that if your friends take it upon themselves to handle there problems an alternate way other than the way you advised them too, that it mat back fire and they will come back to you with the same issue. When they do this you gotta be a good friend and not say "I told you so" but instead support them and have they back. Again, good topic hommie.
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