Can you be friends with your ex?

It is funny because I started this blog months ago but never got around to finishing it. This is something my best friend and I go back and forth about all the time and I try to play both sides of it, while she is adamant that you can not be friends with your ex.

Is it possible to be friends with your ex especially if this is someone you were intimate with. From my experiences I have been able to be friends with people I have been involved with. I normally avoid ugly break ups and I keep moving on with my life. There was clearly a reason that I got involved with that person so why just throw that away.

When I was writing this I never thought about the perspective of the new girlfriend or boyfriend. Recently I went to a party and I was introduced to my ex boyfriend's new girlfriend. While I was happy to meet her and I said hi and everything this girl said nothing and proceeded to mug me to my face. To say the least I was shocked by this behavior. I didn't get it. While my girls all laughed at her immaturity I really started to think. If this had been a few years ago I would have said something nasty and probably made a scene. I could have gotten real ignorant and proclaimed to the world that I did not want her man and asked what the hell was her problem. Instead I felt for her. I put myself in her shoes and looked at how I would feel being her. She knows all about our past and it clearly bothered her. The thing is though at the end of the day its exactly that. OUR PAST. Neither of us is trying to rekindle anything.

I now know that it kills her to know that we still keep in touch. That it eats her up inside when we contact one another and watching her attempts to make sure I am aware she is in the picture. I have been there but I would never act a fool especially in front of people. I guess that is a big part of growing up and facing reality.

So this still leads me to my original question. Can you be friends with your ex? I guess the real answer is that you have to take every ones feelings into consideration. It depends on the circumstances. It depends on the history and the foundation of the friendship to begin with. It depends on if its really worth it to to know how uncomfortable it can be. All of those things play a part in if you can be friends with your ex.